etha*n is 5mths

& to celebrate, i took him for his first ever passport picture-taking at a studio.

mummy what you doing on the floor??!

oh hey, theres the camera!

huh? what aunty? look where?

ok, i pose for you. like this?

ohhh... smile... heres my smile then.

a week of (a few) firsts

first word
this is a bit late coming but sunday, my son said his first word –HI. he said HI to me right after his bath while i was changing him. it was so cute. & kinda long drawn, like Haaiiiii… ok maybe it wasn’t a word but just one of those sounds babies make. but it really sounded like a word. & why would HI be his first word instead of say, beer or shop? well cos we always say HI ETHA*N / HI BABY / HI SON / HI & i say it the same way as he did (if he really was saying a word & not just making a sound lah)… drawn out. he said it a second time sometime during the week too. but then, you know, maybe it wasn’t really a word hehehe.

first taste of cereal
the other first is that my son ate baby rice cereal for the first time also on sunday. he didn’t quite take to it but he did have some. the face was all a-mess. i wish i had taken a picture but my camera was in the car & i didn’t want his first mouthful to be given by the maid. but you know what? after the first few mouthfuls she decided to step in anyways. i am so annoyed. & while i’m giving him a break from the spoon & giving him a few sips of milk from the bottle (which is what the books say i.e. the first few feeds is meant to familiarize your baby with the experience, not necessarily to feed him a full meal), she was tsk tsk-ing me??!! the cheek of that woman! yes, yes… i was at my mil’s again. why do i still go when i don’t like their influence on my son? well, that’s why it’s a love-hate relationship. the way i see it, i do have things to do & occasionally i need someone to babysit & who else should do it but the person i’m paying to do exactly that, right? also, at the end of the day, it’s my husband’s family home & it’s not like i’m cutting off relations with my in laws right. nanti sakit hati plak.

first full turn
when etha*n learned to turn from his back onto his tummy, it seemed like such an achievement. maybe because of the dramatization on his part hehehe. to turn required all the grunts & screams he could muster. so loud & noisy was he that when he finally managed to get onto his tummy, it was like “yayyy baabyyy!”. after that, it looked like he was also trying flip over onto his back but no more drama so i haven’t really been paying attention. maybe also because i’m not around him to notice. but yesterday, he did it!! almost effortlessly. no screaming required. it’s still funny to watch though cos his bum is up in the air & the intricate crossing of the legs & ankles in order for him to flip back is amazing. i know for us adults its like oh no biggie lah right but this is a baby who is just learning to do things.

better hand / finger control
etha*n is now also better able to grab with his fingers. the most prominent is when i’m feeding him & he’ll grab my hands to either push away the milk bottle or to put it into his mouth. push + pull. then sometimes one hand is searching for my finger to hold on to while hes drinking his milk. & boy can he pinch. & punch. sometimes im punched in the eye while im sleeping & hes trying to get my attention. hihihi… the husband said we have to get him some grabbing toys soon. what are grabbing toys?

lets hope all this hand/finger control wont lead him to flick the finger at someone haha.

raising brats

i'm often told to leave the baby to cry. that paying too much attention will spoil him. recently, i spoke to a new-mom friend of mine & jokingly chastised her about spoiling her newborn daughter. something that i've been getting regular doses of myself --albeit not jokingly.

her reply was, "i dont care. shes JUST a baby."

& another friend says "if we dont carry them now, when will we? soon, they'll be walking on their own. soon, they won't even want their uncool parents around."

& i couldnt agree more.

however, here are some sound (huh!!) advice that i've been getting:

1-let the baby be by himself in the cot (gilos ke? im a new mom, you think i wont be staring at him to make sure hes ok ah??)

2-dont "catch&keep" which is a colloquial for dont carry your son or keep your son to yourself all the time that he becomes so attached to you (i want him to be attached to me. im his mom arent i?)

3-let the baby cry (then dapat colic macam mana? cry even more & still let them go on crying isit?)

im confused. im supposed to be "bonding" with my child --especially during my 2 months maternity leave. thats why they give us the 2months right? in europe even better, 9 months maternity leave also got. all in the name of bonding. takkan the baby tu nak bond dengan botol susu kan.

of course, i dont lah pick him up at the slightest sound he makes. yes, i do let him cry some --to strengthen his lungs --but not to the point where hes crying so miserably lah right. & no, i dont "catch&keep" all the time. but think about it. im a working mom. i only get to play with him in the morning for 30mins & when i come back from work. & even then, i have to juggle my need to play with him & the need to do house chores. its not like i carry him for 24hours. duhh! but there, i want him to feel loved & i want him to know that im there. whats so wrong about your child feeling secure about your love huh? how do you justify ignoring a newborn all in the name of teaching him independence?? tak paham lah.

anyways, heres what the experts say. so, to those of you doomsayers --nenenenenehh (finger on nose)!!

***

Should I worry about spoiling my baby?
If I lavish love and attention on my baby, will I spoil him?

Expert Answers
Sandy Bailey, certified family life educator

No. Young babies are completely spoil-proof. Your baby needs all the care and attention you can give. Ignore the advice of well-meaning relatives who think babies need to learn independence. Instead, listen to your parental instinct — that inner voice that tells you to comfort your baby when he cries.

"Spoiled children" have learned to use negative behavior to get what they want. But your baby is too young to purposefully manipulate or annoy you. He cries to communicate his needs, whether they're for a snack, a dry diaper, or a little cuddling with Mom or Dad. When you respond quickly to your baby, you're building his sense of self-worth. You're also establishing a foundation of trust that can last for years to come.

If you give your baby prompt attention, he'll feel more secure and less anxious, giving him the courage to explore the world on his own. And once he understands that you take his cries seriously, he'll be less likely to cry for no reason. In the long run, responding quickly to your baby's needs will make him less clingy and demanding, not more.

By the time your baby is 6 to 8 months old, he'll be paying close attention to cause and effect — noticing, for instance, that his bowl falls when he drops it from the highchair. He'll also start to see a direct link between his actions and your responses. At this point it's okay to set some limits. If your baby starts crying to get something he doesn't need, hold your ground and give him a hug when he calms down. Similarly, give hugs and praise for good behavior and gently redirect him when he's doing something hazardous.

The right blend of love and guidance will eventually help your child understand his place in the world. But for now, your focus should be on giving him as much attention and comfort as you can. No matter how much you give, it's not more than he needs.

in support of the arts (& crafts)

a multi-talented friend of mine made this. she charges SGD5.00 per letter.

it's attached to the playpen by a ribbon.

cool huh?

born liverpool fc

tsk tsk tsk...

the poor thing doesnt have a choice in the matter.

mobile + playpen + companions

mobile fr mothercare rm210

rotates

lullabies

blinking lights

detachable soft toys
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heres mr lion
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sweet cherry playpen from carrefour rm149

navy blue

grey finishings

comes with a detachable basinet
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heres a musical toy courtesy of gramama to etha*n
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this is mr snakey courtesy of etha*ns cousin ayde*n
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4 months

we are family

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i am a poser

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daddy+me
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mata cinaks

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i love kisses

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mummy tickles

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hi i'm 4 months old

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oh halo there

***

anakku yang kini 4bulan umurnya

today etha*n turns 4months. clapclapclap to you baby ball.

my camera is battery-dead & i forgot to charge it from last week. so i got no pictures to upload for now. i'll upload them later lah.

my botak chin son is now growing his hair out. unfortunately, he has a habit of pulling them out still. the latest with etha*n is that hes turning 360 degrees in his cot/playpen. hes quite quick about it too. hes also shouting & screaming now especially when theres company. kinda funny cos hes so excited that there are people around. then he'll be kicking his legs out & throwing his arms up --like so excited liedat lah. funny sure... but not funny when he doesnt want to drink his milk cos hes distracted. omg...

last night, i tried something out with him. i was lying down next to him in my bed & he leaned towards me. at first i thought maybe it was just random body movement but then i moved to his other side & he leaned towards me again. actuallynyer he was leaning towards my arm so he could chomp on it hihihi...

the husband & i got him a mobile (toy, not a mobile phone ya) to keep him company while he berguling-guling in the cot. the husband belanja this one from mothercare at rm210. its quite nice & soothing too. it has lullabies, soft toys going around & around as well as blinking lights.

the other new thing is the new playpen i got for him!! i'm so glad that i got it for only rm149.00 in carrefour. its the "sweet cherry" brand which my friend introduced me to (thanks sonata). & im very happy that its in navy blue & with a bit of grey thrown in. you know, there were pricier brands with uglier designs. shocking pinks & shocking greens... ughhh!! luckiness i got this & cheap too. no more do i have to roll the cot in & out of the bedroom. maneuvering it out of the doorway is one thing, having to lift it over our elevated floors is another.

the other night i got the husband to put etha*n to bed as i was busy with house chores. boy was he crying & crying but the husband finally managed to calm him down. then... guess who decided to stick her head in front of him & smile & wave at him? yup... moi... then i nonchalantly walked into the bathroom for a shower. of course that started the cry fest again hahaha... so farnie... the husband was so anger with me. he said: you KNOW he wants you, why did you wave at him summore?!

hihihi...

pictures

this is his senget smile
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this is his deepavali visiting attire
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check out the crossed ankles. he did it all himself.

muahaha.

***

etha*n is a changeling

- he clasps his hands in front of him & starts staring at his mittens with such concentration that i myself start looking at them.

-he sucks on his fore arm instead of his mittens. maybe because i keep telling him he cant suck on his mittens.

- he sleeps by hiding his face on my chest or shoulder –yes hiding. with the nose penyet-ed on me. which is cute but also worrying. i worry that he cant breathe and i worry that his nose will be permanently flattened. haha.

- i think hes teething cos he seems to want to bite us. & he drools all the time.

- he has a temper –omg does he have a temper. he must get this from me lah ni.

- hes trying to sit up on his own which is also worrying cos he is forever curled into a sitting position now. takuts nanti hunched?

- he knows us. i notice that he will calm down when i take him. & he looks at me instead of anyone else. & when his dad comes, he will give a toothless smile. but then again, he smiles all the time. hmm..

last weekend we had a bit of a scare with him. he was throwing up his milk at each and every feed. and his stool was dark green to the point of being black (I would post a picture of it here but it might disgust you hehe). we wanted to take him to the clinic but the few we went to was closed for the long weekend. however upon consultation with those in-the-know (i.e. medical school dropouts), ethan could’ve been shocked (terkejut) or masuk angin. apparently when babies are shocked they are unsettled & the blackish stool is actually bile. and the puke is also yellow. not milky white but bile yellow. so sad ok. towards the end tu, when he was puking bile instead of milk, i was crying while he was puking. susah my hati.

this all started on saturday night cos we took him to his uncle’s house at about 730pm. he started puking at 930pm and only stopped puking the next morning. not lah puke continuously but right after his feeds. and he pukes out of the nose as well. then he’ll cry so pitifully –so heart wrenching ok. & I’ll be holding him to my chest with the puke drenching both of us. I can’t even put him down or pass him to the husband as he doesn’t want me to let go. so sweet hor but so very very kasian like that.

the kadazans/chinese/malays/indians all believe almost the same thing:

i) kadazans – masuk angin or something shocked him

ii) chinese – terkejut cos something shocked him

iii) indians – don’t take him out at night because there are “things” roaming about & children are more sensitive to this than adults

iv) malays – taking him out at about 7-730pm is not a good time because there are “things” roaming about

v) indonesian – masuk angin or something shocked him

im not gonna argue with anything. so i'll just play it safe for now. i mean maybe this is all superstition but surely theres some scientific logic behind it right, as with most superstition.

its amazing how fast time has flown & how big he is now. he'll turn 4months next week. i wonder what new things are gonna happen. but in my readings, the turning 4months apparently brings with it many challenges. crankiness, changing sleep & feed habits etc. sebab tunggu gigi keluar i suppose & theres a growth spurt in the 4th month.

so, heres to more change. i hope we'll survive it!

(other people's explanation for) what motherhood does to me

No matter how much you prepare for it, parenting will blow your mind.

Kids will challenge you, bring you to tears, crack you up,
and make you forget what you urgently had to do.

They'll shatter the life you knew into a million pieces.

Then they'll put it back together, like a stained-glass window,
into something infinitely more complicated and beautiful.

awww...

yet another milestone

today i join the throngs of people who send their kids to someone else to care for.

my parents abandoned us on saturday. & for most of the weekend, it was just us 3 as a family.

i'm proud to announce that i even managed to sweep, mop & do the laundry. clap clap clap for me. the husband has also attempted to feed etha*n. unfortunately for him, the baby's started becoming a bit unpredictable with his feed times. unfortunately for me, the husband fell sick yesterday so he hasnt been able to help me with the baby. never mind. hes made up for it by doing the housework.

today is etha*n's first day with my MIL's maid. yes, despite all my complaints, we have decided to send him to her after all. better a known devil than an unknown one (ok i gotta stop being bitchy). also, we found out that the babysitters in kepong run up to rm650 - rm750. madness hor? ALSO, because the MIL's maid is a bit sot-sot, we've decided to apply for the new maid at the end of the month. if the new maid comes early, then she will stay with us & in the mornings i'll send her & the baby to my SIL's. & later when the MIL's maid goes bye-bye in june 2009, the new maid will move in with the MIL. the financial arrangements are that we split the cost of getting the new maid as well as her monthly pay 50-50. my dad asked me why dont i just get my own maid. well, one i live in an apartment & i've got no place for the maid to "live" in (not just sleep in). second, i live in an apartment & i need some privacy.

ok so back to my son's childcare arrangements: hes with the maid now. i told him to make sure he smiles at her a lot so that her hati pun sejuk towards him. & boy has he taken my instructions to heart. he has smiled & chuckled non-stop since saturday night when we went there to visit & get him used to the maid. so much so that one of the uncles told him to "save it for tomorrow". hehehe. in the mornings i drive him to my MIL's with him sitting in the car seat next to me. which apparently is not the right place for him but at the moment i need him to be able to see me or else he'll be cranky. so, i'll be driving & he'll be smiling at me. so farnee.

i'm heading home now to get my son. i cant wait to see him.

3mths old today

etha*n is 3 months old today :-). happy birthday my ball of a baby boy. i love love love you.

hes going for a jab today. so i hope he'll take it well like he did the last one. but i know he might get a fever in the early hours of the morning. poor baby.

he can laugh & chitchat & turn over onto his tummy & scream & tsktsk & pull himself up to a sitting position.

his grandpa says that he is demanding & determined & has a temper. i hope he wont be like me.

my mom says that he is physically present but mentally absent because sometimes hes staring straight at you but when you say something hes jolted out of his reverie.

he smiles a lot & chortles & plays along when he is tickled.

at 2 months & 3 weeks old, he weighed in at 6.71kg. so maybe hes 7kgs today?

he recognizes his daddy & i love seeing them together. he loves his music & sings along all the time. but mostly when hes sleepy & being rocked to sleep.

when he wants attention, he gives a little cough here & there. till you pay attention. so cute lah.

the best is waking up & seeing him sleeping contentedly next to me. & i love saying "dont cry, mummy's right here."

i took him to church yesterday & he was such a good boy. i guess the airconditioning helped some. lucky me.

i cant wait till its december & he goes off on his first plane ride. & celebrates his first christmas. & meets his sabahan side. i want them to say: hello baby etha*n, you're half sabahan too.

for my friend

although you don't want it,

i'll give it to you anyways.

so here's my heartfelt wishes to you.

~pat pat~

~hug hug~

and hold on to this:

you're not alone.

come talk to me if you want.

my son's milestones

i cant believe how time has flown.

• started drooling
• starts wearing bibs for drool-control
• stopped using mittens because he sucks on them so much then smears drool all over his face giving him a pimply look :-p
• sick for the first time; he has the flu & is coughing. altho its quite sad to see him like this, his coughs are really cute.

who knew i could love someone this much? even his awful-est, nastiest smells are addictive to me. really.

the best is the sour-y smell of his teeny tiny fingers, enclosed in drool-soaked mittens & fermented day & night. masam... but hes my son & i love everything about him.

ok maybe his poop smell is an acquired thing. but i'm getting there. :-D

i am so anal

some day when my son is older, he will read this & think my madre said "anal".

he is nearly 10weeks old & i am already planning his first birthday. oh well, better to be prepared right? right.

we've decided on the theme & even his attire for the day. we already have an idea of what kind of entertainment he'll have. in fact, i've already started on the guest list (?!!??) & we're about to buy the party supplies.

lucky kid.

saiko mom.

anyways, ive also made a list of things to pack for our trip back to sabah. if i was totally without control, i would've already started packing now. hihihi... actualllllyyyy... i already put his clothes aside. in fact, we've already bought his christmas baju. timberland summore. omg im gonna spoil him silly. how lah this? but but but... theres hope for me still cos i havent bought his attire for my brother's wedding. but hmm... when shall i do that? i was also thinking of getting another diaper bag but the backpack type so i can stuff all his things in & still have my hands free to deal with him while we're at the airport. but it is too pricey lah... about rm300 to rm500. madness or what. i read in this forum that one lady paid rm1700 for hers. gilos.

what present can i give him for christmas ah?

i recently ordered something for him & it will be delivered by october. not for christmas but i feel bad that we actually havent bought him many things. most of his clothes are either hand-me-downs or gifts from other people. but we, his parents, havent really gotten him anything. other than the cot & the car seat.

i want to get him some developmental toys. or some kiddy music cds or books. but then i'll need a small player to put in my room.

at the moment he has this to play with:

i so geram with him lah.

back to work

hello.

my 2 months maternity leave is up. today is my 6th day back at work. i haven’t really had the time or inclination to update my blog. i notice this about new moms. i just don’t feel like logging on & crafting an entry.

etha*n just turned 2months last saturday. we took him to the pediatrician for his jab. i was so afraid for him haha… but he took it like a real trooper. he didn’t even cry when the needle was stuck into him. but he did give a small yelp a few seconds after that. hehe. both the husband & i are quite proud of him. he is now 6.16kg (at birth 3.19kg) and 63cm (at birth 47.5cm). in the last few days, hes been having slight fever in the early hours of the morning & i notice has been a bit crankier than usual. this is due to the jab but he is much better now.

look at him now.

etha*ns a real smiley baby. i have been thinking that i should take more pictures & videos of his smiles & chuckles & i have, but nothing beats seeing it live hehehe. i know it sounds lame, but hes a real joy to have. hes starting to have conversations with us now with his cooing & yelping. when i sing him to sleep, he “sings” along. well, he coos while i sing & when i stop, he stops.

at the moment my parents are still around to care for him while im at work but they’re leaving mid-oct. then its time to send him to my mil’s maid. eughh!! shes actually quite good with kids. i just don’t like her attitude with adults. hehehe…

i’ve been getting a lot of comments & advice on not manja-ing the baby by carrying him or singing to him or swaying while i put him to sleep. i’ve gotten so tired of it & heres my answer. hes only a 2 month old baby. its time for me to bond with him. i do want him to be independent but come on… he is only still a baby. i want him to feel loved. sometimes he gets up from a nap & starts looking around the room frantically & i have to keep calling him so he knows he’s not alone. it must be a mom thing but i find everything about him adorable. including his crying. if i’m separated from him, i can even tell his brand of crying in a shopping mall (i.e. when he’s with my parents i mean).

life has certainly changed. he sleeps with me in bed at the moment because the husband is not well & has been relegated to the floor. by the way, he relegated himself. etha*ns cot is outside in the living room to make way for the husband’s mattress. i often sleep with my glasses on to the point that it’s kangkang now hehehe. having him in bed with me makes it easier for me to feed him at night but we’re still hoping that we can let him sleep on his own in his cot. im mixing breast feeding with formula feeds. at my peak, i could express enough breast milk for 4x 2oz feeds which was great... at first. then i started missing the actual breast feeding, you know, where the baby is latched on to your boob. its nice to bond with the baby that way. its not the most easiest thing to do cos yes, at first there was the pain & the cracked & bleeding nipples. now its less painful so i guess it was just a matter of getting a hang of it. now that im back at work, my milk flow has reduced, & im feeling guilty for not breastfeeding fully. at the end of the day, i try as much as possible to breastfeed only for his night feeds. the breastfeeding probably helped with the weight reduction but now that im so irregular at it, my weight has stagnated at 51kg.

im experiencing a bit of the separation anxiety that people talk about so much now that i’m back at work, but there are times when i feel guilty cos i don’t have it so bad. maybe this is because i’m used to being away from him cos during my maternity leaves i was running a lot of errands and driving my siblings around (they came to visit). maybe my separation anxiety is not too bad but my feelings of guilt for not being with him & not breastfeeding is. by the time i’m done with my errands or work & reach home, i’m so guilt-stricken that i’ll be hugging the life out of him.

hes so cute & round –i call him “mummy’s ball of a baby boy”. my mum calls him “humpty dumpty”. hehehe…

my “ball of a baby boy” was baptised in a small chapel in sungai buloh. a real out of the way chapel... like going into the jungle like that. but i liked it. it felt very cosy & personal. the baptism was held on merdeka day which fell on a sunday. lucky for us, monday was a day off. i actually dont have any pictures of him in his outfit taken on that day itself. so the following pictures were taken after the event.

notes to self - for future reference

on breastfeeding

- breastfeeding on one breast stimulates the other breast to leak milk. an electrical breast pump on the other boob helps. or you can use a breastpad to soak up the leakage.

- even if breastfeeding, make sure there is formula milk at home as the baby may not be getting enough milk from mommy in the first few days (cos mommy’s milk may not have come in yet) & will cry the house down due to hungriness.

- the diaper rash cream “bepanthen” can also be used to deal with sore / cracked nipples. get this at your local pharmacy.

- get a breastfeeding support pillow –good for elevating baby & supporting your arms so you can lean back & not slouch.

- for me, best to breastfeed while lying down cos it's kinder to the back.


other matters

- babies nails are very soft in the first few days so cutting them may be tricky as you cant tell which is nail & which is skin. it helps to wait till the 2nd week when baby’s nails have hardened a little. in the meantime, use them mittens!

- having short nails is more practical when dealing with babies.

- some things should already be prepared at home even before you deliver because husbands may not know what to get (or they may) e.g. formula milk, nipple cream, thermometer, thermo pot.

- a thermo pot is very useful cos you’ll need hot water for cleaning baby’s poop in the middle of the night.

- you can sterilize bottles once a day (with a sterilizer or just by boiling in a pot). in between sterilizing, you can soak in boiling water.

- you will have backaches after delivery due to bending over attending to baby’s poop & pee. this is also because apparently your tummy muscles don’t work as efficiently.

- if you have piles / hemorrhoids / constipation, you will worry about the first bowel movements after the delivery. make sure you drink lots of fluids & eat a lot of fiber. also, check with your gynea if you can take “daflon” to deal with the piles and “lactul” to soften the stool –these can be bought at the pharmacy. daflon are pills and lactul is a type of syrup.

- get your girdle & corset ready. i got mine from cosway at about rm100 for both. avon sells a 3-piece set for rm270.

- my family doesn’t believe in using pacifiers for babies but my in-laws are big fans of it. we’ve taken the “never say never” path & use one in emergencies..

- babies can be restless when you’re changing them. as an alternative to pacifiers, use your knuckle for them to suck on. of course, this only works if someone else is changing baby. make sure hands are washed clean before putting into baby’s mouth though. if husband’s fingers are hairy, this may not work. hehehe.

- diaper rash creams that have “zinc” in them work better.

- the chinese bedak amoi (the square one) works to reduce milk rash or any kind of rash on the face i suppose

about etha*n alexand*er

hello world

i am exactly 15 days old today

date: sunday 13 july 2008

time: 1pm
weight: 3.19kg

height: 47.5cm

pantai medical centre kl

i delivered etha*n in week 38 of 40 i.e. 11 days early. it wasn’t really a surprise cos the gynea told me to be on standby from week 36 onwards. i was also “expecting” to deliver early. well, its more like i “hoped” that etha*n would come early as i could no longer take the weight of being pregnant. on my last friday at work, i had already planned to ask my gynea for a 2 week mc for the rest of the pregnancy. at 38 weeks, etha*n was already 3.19kg & i was 63.5kg (18.5kg heavier than my pre-pregnancy weight). if i had delivered later, i suppose etha*n would have been heavier & who knows if i could deliver him vaginally.

etha*ns doing well except for a bit of jaundice which he developed on day 3. the pediatrician at pantai told us to sunbathe him for 30mins in the morning & in the evening for 3 consecutive days. unfortunately, the weather's been a bit off since he developed it. we went to another pediatrician who told us that sunbathing does more harm than good & that we shouldn’t worry as its just a mild case of jaundice. the rule of thumb is that as long as he continues to poo & pee regularly & remain active, the jaundice will be worked out of his system on its own.
etha*ns a smiley little boy. in fact, i’ve caught him chuckling in his sleep a couple of times. muahaha... its a real hoot to watch. im lucky to see it though cos the husband hasnt had the opportunity to catch these involuntary laughs. so farnee.

hes now 2 weeks old & starting to show some manja-ness. at night he sleeps best when placed between the husband & i, which makes it difficult to train him to sleep on his own. i just don’t have the energy to keep getting up from bed & rocking him to sleep again & again. besides, the nurses told me to breastfeed in bed at night. its really cute to see him snuggle up to me though. in fact i’ve been telling him that he can only manja with me & the husband & no one else. hehehe…

check out his macho look:

about the delivery

saturday 12july2008

got up at 9am dying to pee. relieved myself & found streaks of blood in the toilet bowl. heart skipped a beat. the husband called the gynea who asked us to come in for a checkup at the clinic. the husband made me a tuna sandwich for breakfast. showered, washed my hair etc & went to the clinic. gynea said i’m having my “pink show” & am already in pre-labor. told me to go & do whatever i wanted –shop, walkabout, eat whatever, clean the house etc. she expected me to go into labor only around midnight or on sunday morning or at the latest by monday. before we left, i told the gynea that i wanted to have the epidural & she said “we’ll see. i’ll let you go through some of the pains first before we administer the epidural.”

so we went to the curve & checked out paddington’s house of pancakes as recommended by some friends. didn’t quite enjoy myself as i was afraid my water bag would burst while i was walking about in a shopping mall so we left after brunch. we got the cleaners to come at 2pm to give the apartment a good cleaning before baby came & i thought that it would be good for me to do some light exercises so i joined in the cleaning as well. the husband made up our bed & the baby’s cot while i got the baby toiletries ready.

in the evening, the husband went for a swim & since neither of us wanted me to stay in the apartment by myself, i decided to walk around the pool while he swam.

we had planned to have some steak for dinner & durians too despite the husband having a total aversion to the fruit hehehe. but in the end i was too tired to go out. the mil came, at the husbands request, with some chicken wings for supper & she spent the night. his justification to me was “since we don’t know what to expect, its best that we have her around.”

we went to bed around midnight.

sunday 13july2008

i felt the first contraction at 223am. it wasnt excruciating but i felt it enough to wake me up. funny how i just knew to start timing myself. i didn’t even know what contractions felt like. the books say that “you’ll know when its time.” i guess they weren’t kidding. ok so for the benefit of other first time moms, to me, it felt like painful period cramps. so, i got up & got a pen & notebook & started jotting down the times the contractions came. told the husband i’ll monitor till contraction no. 10 & will wake him up then. when no. 10 came i texted my gynea who told me to go on to the hospital. i woke the husband up & took my shower & we left at about 530am. on the way to the hospital there was a police roadblock. the husband said to the police officer “bang, tengah mengandung bang.” muahahha… of course he meant to say “bersalin”. so farnee. in the car i decided to have a breakfast of 2 slices of raisin bread. just in case i wasn’t allowed to eat later.

we checked into the hospital at 6am & i was wheelchair-ed to the delivery ward. my mil was with me while the husband parked the car. it is a very very awkward moment having to don on a butt-revealing hospital robe in front of the mil ok. i mean, the husband asked her over the night before cos he said we wouldnt know what to expect. ok fair enough. but in the delivery room?? you’ve gotta be joking man. i mean i love my mil ok but i don’t really want to have her there while i kangkang my legs out & scream profanities at the husband right. just in case that happens lah. so i told the husband my feelings & he said that he doesn’t think she will be there while i deliver. lovely.

while the husband & the mil went to the cafeteria for breakfast, the gynea came to break my water bag at 805am & the nurse gave me an enema which looks like some kind of water in a bottle with a long thin nozzle which they shove up your behind & squirt into your bowels. luckily i asked the nurse how long it would take till i felt like pooping. she said almost immediately. even luckier was that i had enough sense to prop myself up earlier just in case i suddenly felt like letting go & tak sempat sampai the bathroom haha. so yes, as soon as i managed to swing my legs over to the side of the bed (which was quite difficult seeing as i had this bump in front of me as well as contractions), the urge came so i had to rush to the bathroom, with my legs tightly clenched hehehe. in my rush, i forgot to grab my towel. i had disrobed & was washing up when i heard the husband come into the delivery room moments later. i asked for my towel & opened the bathroom door with the hospital robe held up to cover my front but not my back. & guess what… my mil was the one who handed me the towel & since there was a big mirror behind me, she could’ve easily seen my naked back. luckily she wasn’t looking. hehehe… malu lah… anyways, she went home before everything really started so i was saved from further embarrassment.

i managed to make a few calls to consult some friends & my sister on whether to go ahead with the epidural. in the end, i decided against it. a nurse came in somewhere between 9am & 10am & told us that my contractions were coming a bit slow & that i wasn’t dilating fast enough & that the doctor decided to induce me. omg… within seconds of the drips entering my blood stream i was crying my eyes out. the pain!! it was so painful the nurses could hear my crying from outside the room. i remember one of the nurses coming in & giving me a jab in the butt which made me sleep in between contractions but didn’t take the contraction pains away. i remember saying “oww oww oww… so pain so pain!!” to the husband. i remember the nurse coming in again & setting up the gas mask for me. the husband was holding it to my face every time i needed it. later he told me that i seemed so angry with him & wouldn’t talk to him for 2 hours hehehe. so he sat beside me for 2 hours holding my hand but i didn’t talk to him, the poor man. he tried inhaling the gas twice just to see what the effect was like for me. ok so these were the pain relief i opted for instead of the epidural:

opioid analgesia - this is an injection given at the buttocks by the nurse. it doesn't remove all the labour pains, but still gives satisfactory relief to most mothers. nausea and vomiting may occur in some patients, who will be given anti vomiting medicines.

inhalation analgesia - the most common is entonox, a mixture of 50% oxygen and 50% nitrous oxide. it is usually used toward the end of the first stage of labour. you are required to fit the mask firmly over the face and inhale when you experience the painful contractions. you may feel a little light headed when breathing in the gas, but this feeling will disappear quickly when you stop using the gas.

sometime during the labor contractions, i remember i felt like pushing & i must’ve looked like i was pushing cos the husband told me not to push (he told me later that he didn’t want me to push while he was alone with me in the delivery room hahaha… basically he wanted me to wait till the doctor came in). i think (cos i don’t remember much) i told him to tell the nurses / doctor that i’ve started feeling like pushing. i don’t remember when exactly but suddenly the doctor & 2 nurses came in, examined me & said that it was time cos i was already 9cm dilated. next thing i knew, they made me open my legs & made me grab 2 handles at the side of the bed. i suppose the handles were for me to use as leverage while i pushed.

so i pushed & pushed. i wasn’t bothered with the pain by then, i just did what they told me to do. i was actually sleeping between contractions. i think i was doing it wrong cos they kept telling me not to shout / scream. that i should push as though i was constipated. the husband was also trying to coach me. at one point i got annoyed with everyone for telling me not to scream. i wasn’t screaming out of pain. i was just screaming cos you know, when you push, you’re exhaling. & at times i was exhaling for so long i lost my breath & screaming made me last longer without any air hehehe. according to the husband, 30mins into the pushing, our little one arrived. he was crying as they passed him to me & i remember thinking “my son looks chinese & so familiar.” while they took him to the nursery to be examined, i was being stitched up.

they brought him back a while later all wrapped up but still bloody. i guess its to make sure that no more time was lost for proper bonding. i stayed in the delivery room for about 2 hours before they transferred me to the maternity ward. it was amazing that i could still inch myself from one bed to the other bed. maybe cos the pain killers were still working.

anyways, thank god, everything went well with me & with the baby. we got discharged the day after. to everyone who came by for a visit, thank you.

ok one last thing. i know other first time parents would be interested to know how much it cost us. the total cost came up to about rm3,700 for a 1.5-day stay & a straight-forward normal delivery with minimal complications i.e. vaginal birth with no epidural for the pain & no vacuum / forceps for the delivery. it might have been cheaper if i wasn’t induced & if i didn’t take any form of pain relief.

baby sitting woes

allow me to bitch about my mil’s maid

my mil has a bloody demanding maid. arggghhh!! this maid is supposed to take care of blub when he turns about 3 months. its already been agreed that we will pay her an extra rm150 on top of her current gaji of rm450. the rm150 was actually paid to her earlier when she was taking care of another cucu. in the last 4 months, although she no longer takes care of that particular cucu, my mil has continued to pay her the rm150 based on the agreement that she will take care of blub later. so kira bonus lah for the maid right? not taking care of anyone but still getting the rm150 for the last 4 months.

well, guess what? little miss maid has decided to balloon her head up & demand for an additional rm200 to take care of the baby. that’s rm200 on top of the rm150 that shes been getting.

wtf right.

in total, she will be paid rm800 with the breakdown as follows:

- rm350 initial pay (she came into malaysia 5yrs ago)
- rm150 babysitting gaji for taking care of cucu #1
- rm100 a pay raise from my mil when miss maid’s employment contract was extended for a year (june08 to june09)
- rm200 babysitting gaji for taking care of blub

i am so anger about this. heres why:

i) she came into my mil’s household as a pitiful maid who was treated rather inhumanely by her previous boss. she was thin & boy did she hit the jackpot coming into this home. here, shes allowed many liberties: she can nap, she can chitchat with her boss, allowed to have a hp, to have a day off every now & again etc. & now, well now, shes turned into this big-headed, pijak-kepala-boss kinda maid. argggghhh!!! she can SHOUT at my mil can you believe that? she even has the cheek to scold my mil if she wanted to.

ii) she already agreed to take care of blub for rm150. now shes going back on her word. its not so much our paying her the rm200 as my mil will only ask us to pay THAT rm200 while she herself continues to pay the rm150, IF we agree to paying the maid rm200. so at the end of the day, for us, its just an added rm50 damage to our finances.

iii) she threatened not to look after blub if we don’t pay her the rm200. wtf!!!!!!!!! in other words, its non-negotiable lah right. in her own words “oh kalau macam tu, saya tak mau jaga lah.”

iv) i hate hate hate being forced into paying her just because (a) she asked for it (b) we’re afraid that if we don’t pay her that exact amount i.e. if we manage to negotiate it down to say rm150 (mind you, this is rm150 on top of the previous rm150 ok), then, she might do something to blub.

v) i hate hate hate hate hate thinking that if she has this “i’m in charge” attitude then maybe as parents, we cant even tell her how to take care of our child. you know, basic things like “don’t ever bring my child out of the house without my permission”. & believe you me, she has done this with cucu #1 many times.

other than this rm200-for-blub issue, apparently she has also decided to kira her gaji on a daily basis i.e. she went back to indonesia in december & came back sometime late in the month so she only worked like 3 days in december. come payday in january, she claimed payment for the 3 days of work in december. so berkira or what???

i was so angry that i told the husband that here are my conditions. we will agree to pay her the rm200 but:

i) we will pay her rm200 & not rm150+rm200.
ii) the rm150 stops now because shes not taking care of anyone. the new pay will begin in october (when blub is sent to her).
iii) for the first 4 months of taking care of blub, she will only be paid rm50 because for the last 4 months she has been getting rm150 for nothing.
iv) the rm200 will be pro-rated based on how many days she takes care of blub i.e. in october & december respectively, she will only take care of blub for 2 weeks in each of those months.

inhumane? not really. it just means that in total she will be paid only rm650. isn’t that quite a lot? other maids only get rm500 right? she says shes asking for more because shes taking care also of an 86yr old lady (the husband’s grandma) but then again, when she joined the household, she knew this already. and, the 86yr old grandma is capable of doing almost everything for herself. the maid is just there to keep an eye on her. & ya, maybe listen to her nagging. other than that, shes capable of feeding, bathing, shitting, walking up&down the stairs, even carrying little babies all by herself. she just needs to have someone around with her, but that’s it. and on top of all this, this old lady has other children who she visits on a rotational basis. so in any one month, she may be away for a week or two.

this maid gets to nap every afternoon. she sleeps in the same room with the old lady but it seems like she pulak is the owner of the room. she says she is praying but hello, do you lock the room for AN HOUR to pray ah? that’s five times one hour a day isit? so every day she gets 5hours of prayer time isit? whenever the grandma needs to use the ensuite bathroom, she has to wait for the maid to finish up & unlock the room door. either that or she has to walk up 2 flights of stairs to get to another bathroom. i have many many muslim friends including a muslim sister. firstly, no one has ever needed to pray in a locked room. in fact, as long as i don’t bother them, i can even be in the same room while they pray. secondly, tak pernah pun i dengar people pray for an hour for each prayer time.

this maid also argues that shes been here for 5yrs so she should be getting more than the newer maids. ok, true but why she want to sibuk about other maids? she wants to get paid more then she leave the country & come back in lah. but then you'll only be paid rm500 & not rm600 which you're getting now izenit? so cant you just be bloody grateful & not demand for rm800. biyatch.

oh yes, & have i mentioned that this one’s gotta mouth on her? i once called out to her & she SHOUTED back at me. so i shouted right back at her & told her to speak nicely. why? no manners ah?? another time, she told me that i was not a good person because i didn’t ask her if she had eaten. what the fucking hell… she, the maid, never asked us whether we had eaten also but we must ask her that??? wtffff…

i don’t know why my mil puts up with her.

anyways, i have expressed my anger & concerns to both the husband & the mil. so, the conclusion is & i hate to say this, we are gonna pay her rm200 as demanded (shit) but her contract will expire in june09 at which time i can tell her fuck off (whoopieee) & then we’re gonna share with mil on the cost of getting a new maid. yeah, agency costs as well as monthly salary.

good riddance to bad rubbish.

dreams

i dreamt that i had already delivered mr blub but forgot to feed him for 4 days. madness or what? in the same dream, after 4 days from delivery, i noticed that my tummy was already flat. wooohooo!!

according to literature, i would get "intense dreams" right about now.

i wonder what else i'll dream about.

slowdown due to size

we went to our 35th week checkup last weekend. the good news is that my sugar level is under control. my weight is now 61.9kg & baby blub is at approximately 2.4kg. at the time of writing this, i am nearing the end of week 36 which means that i have 4 weeks to go till my due date.

the doctor is working under the assumption that i will be delivering normally/vaginally. she cant tell yet whether i'll need a c-sect cos she cant assess how big the baby will be at the time of birth (cos it could pre- or post-term delivery mah). however, she did say this: looking at the husband & moi, the baby at 2.4kg now is a bit big (considering the parents' sizes lah). sighhh...

i am slowing down on a lot of things. not by choice really but just cos the body cant take much of anything anymore. walking is difficult cos i feel so heavy. i try to go for my recommended walks in the evening but tired lah. the husband drives me to work now although i still have to drive back from work on my own seeing as his official work hours end at 9pm. i cant be waiting for him to get me after 9pm now can i? i'm also feeling nervous about driving around on my own these days but like i said, i dont have much of a choice. if only i had a chauffeur. heh. wishful thinking. every little ache & pain makes me wonder if its labour pains im facing.

anyways, wanna see how big i am now? :-)

today someone asked me if i was carrying twins. hehe. dunno to be insulted or not lah.

bulats

lookit me.
im so round.
its the face that gets to me.
its bulat.

why cant i look like a. jolie ah?

nerves

we are 5 weeks away from the EDD.

but you know what they say –it can be plus/minus 2 weeks. so im more than a little nervous right now. seeing as its my first time, i don’t even know what to expect. even with the baby movements, i don’t know whats a kick or a twitch or a punch or whatever. people ask me “oh wheres the head & wheres the feet?” & im like “errr… i dunnnnoooo!!” apparently, pregnant women will get braxton hicks contractions –this is the body’s way of practicing for real labor contractions. but, yeah, you guessed it… i don’t know whether i’m having these practice contractions or if its really the baby moving. so i worry that i wont know when the time comes. of course, every piece of literature i’ve come across says that “you’ll know” when it’s the real thing. i’m afraid that i wont get to the hospital in time & blub will be delivered in the car. i’m afraid that the husband wont be around when the water bag breaks, seeing as his working hours are different than mine. he says he will arrange for a back-up but i really really want him to be there from the first pain, the first realization, the first anything. cos i’ll be so afraid.

i’m afraid of going through the labor pains. of having an episiotomy. of tearing naturally. of not being able to have a doodie dot com session after the delivery for fear of tearing the stitches. of going through hours & hours of labor. i’m afraid that i cant deliver vaginally & have to have a c-section. now i’m thinking why don’t i just opt for a c-section in advance? but you see, my mom had 6 of us normally. my sisters had their kids normally. other women who are smaller than i am had their kids normally. so i should be able to do it too right? but my doctor says it really depends on how big the baby is compared to me.

i hope the husband cries when i cry. that’ll be justice enough. in the husband’s family, shouting in pain during labor is considered embarrassing. me being me, i joked that i’ll shout & scream my head off even if i wasn’t in pain just to make the husband feel guilty. but now, now, i’m genuinely scared.

the husband’s aunt who’s married to an italian says that it is the italian custom for the husband to give the wife diamonds for giving him a son. & seeing as the husband is so perasan that he is an italian (not) muahahaha… so i wonder, wonder, wonder… would i be getting any rocks? tengok-tengok dapat batu sungai hihihihi… which of course i will throw at him… no lah, i’ll treasure it forever. maybe i’ll timbun it with layers and layers of soil, rock, sand etc… & billions of years from now it will turn into petroleum & will make my descendents rich oil tycoons.

see, always find the positive in things. hihihi… yes, even if you get accused of day dreaming too much…

hihihi...

confessions of a (pregnant) shopaholic

hi my name is (pregnant) woman & im a shopaholic.

on top of that im also in denial... despite being 8 months preggers, i insist on buying non-maternity clothes.

i have been complaining to the husband that ive got nothing to wear. especially on the casual side. & ive been meaning to visit this shop called amour in dsara utama. the clothes are sold at a very reasonable price. so yesterday, after work, i drove over & shopped to my heart's content. on plastic. & i visited not just amour, but amos too (another cheap-ish boutique if you can call it that). sigh...

as most shopaholics are wont to do, i would like deal with my guilty conscience by saying this: but i got it for cheappppp. truly.

i spent rm370 for 14 items which makes it an average of rm26 per item. cheap right? however, the only maternity item i got was this ONE top. the others are just stretch-y stuff. yoga pants which, instead of folded down at the hips (cos though the pants is black, the folding area is colorful so folding it makes it rather vogue), i can pull up over my tummy. some stretchy tops which can be used even after i deliver. i have decided that i will also use the yoga pants to work --who cares if theyre not proper office attire. as long as i wear it with a work-top, nobody would know the difference. we pregnant women cant be too fussy. have you seen the prices of proper maternity clothes?? madness. besides, they look too pregnant to me. & thats a no-no for a person who's in denial like moi.

i did feel guilty about spending the money & apologized to the husband. his reaction was: why lah you apologizing to me? its ok lah, it was bound to come out --you really are a shopaholic. ciss...

oh well, it's my money right. actually, it's the bank's money. but it's still my debt. i wish i were a rich celebrity with a personal stylist. i also wish i had a personal trainer so i can get fit after my pregnancy. at the moment the thighs are all-a-jiggles. i think if i were to attach bells on them, boleh lah nyanyi lagu jingle bells. the husband, bless his soul, says im not fat. well im not. but im flabby since i got pregnant. i got friends who are bigger than i am but theyre so... non-jiggly. why ah? why cant i be like them? still, i should count myself lucky hor? there are also people who are big AND jiggly. at least im small & jiggly.

but you know, this obsession women have about being slim & all, it's really just a woman thing. of course, we can always blame it on the men who we feel want us to be slim right? but not all men are like that. my brother has a big-ish wife. shes not super fat lah but shes not slim either. my brother once told a girl friend of mine (who was obsessed with losing weight) that there are men who like big women. some even like them obese. the reality is that some men like something to grab. & i will have to concur with that. the husband is always complaining that im too small. ok lah maybe not now that im 8months pregnant. he'll look at pictures of my teenage self & say: ahhh see, you looked so fit then. now you look fragile.

ok how did i get on to this topic?

so back to shopping...

this weekend, im going shopping for pillows. for when my (big) family comes. i gotta slip-proof my bathroom too so that my mom will feel more secure when she bathes the baby for me so im buying something for that --i dont know what but something. i gotta oil my door hinges before my dad comes cos he will go mad listening to the creaking sounds. im sure i'll find more things to buy when i get to wherever im shopping. but this time, i think i'll use the husband's plastic instead.

diet modification

tsk tsk tsk...

it seems i am a borderline gestational diabetic. so, i have to modify my diet. cut down on sweet things (obviously), carbohydrates & even fruits & juices. i cant have yogurt unless its the non-flavored kind. im a bit iffy on whether i can have milk. im to purchase a glucose monitor/meter so that i can update a daily monitoring chart. gilos. luckily i only have about 6 weeks to go before i pop. sigh, its rather difficult to review my diet plan at the moment. i mean i can give up the obvious things like ice-creams/lollies/sweets. but how about the daily things i eat? charsiewpau, rice, dimsum, bread, peanut butter etc? of all the fruits i mentioned to the doctor, the only approved fruits are guava & green apples. sigh... & im on mango-mode at the moment. & i just bought some oranges too. lers. the husband has to finish them all. i'll be looking on in envy.

again, the baby was hiding his face at today's check-up. this time with his hands over his face. malu-malu kucing pulak. sigh... hes now 2.1kg & big momma is only 59.9kg. i thought i'd be like over 60kg.

im in the office now & i took off my bra. hehehe... it was hurting me. almost time to leave now so im gonna have to whip into the ladies to put it back on again.

stretchy stretchy

i discovered to my utter dismay that i have developed the ugly stretch marks. theyre not white silvery lines. their ugly crimson ones. i didnt notice them at first because theyre right under my tummy above the pubes.

last week, i was appalled to see some snaking on my sides/waist. they didnt look like much at first & i thought they were just indentations from my pants, but to my horror, they kept becoming more & more obvious as the days went by. sobbbbbssss!! & so, i began my frantic check on other parts of the tummy & found, jengjengjeng... even MORE under the tummy above the pubes.

& i thought (or hoped) that i wouldnt succumb to this. wahhh!! i think using the lotion/cream to keep stretch marks at bay is a hoax. serious shit. it helps with the itching, sure. but think about it logically lah right. sure lah your skin will stretch izenit. sighhh... the question really is how stretchy is your skin. if its very stretchy then less marks, if resistant to stretching then more marks. ok wateva, dont listen to me, im just trying to make myself feel better. my doctor said that she never used any creams even & that whatever you do, the cursed things will come. sighhh...

the tummy looks like a ball now. hihihi... i SO do not have a nice looking tummy. maybe a nice shape but not nice skin over the tummy. as you can see from the pictures below. enjoy. dont barff too much.

can you see the stretch marks?

i applied some oil to help with the itching. but the stretch marks came anyways.

the bump vs the thighs vs the feet.

thank goodness the feet have yet to swell. doesnt mean theyre pretty though.

the husbands hairy hand vs the bump.

pregnancy updates (week31-32)

at my last check-up, i found out that i potentially have a gestational diabetes situation. i did the pee-on-the-stick thingy as usual, and instead of not changing color as per my previous check-ups, it turned a ferocious red. i thought i did something wrong. then i thought, am i bleeding? but no, i wasn’t. so i hurried to the nurse’s station & showed it to her. she tut-tut-ed me saying “haiya, your sugar lah!!” so, this friday, im on mc (again) as i have to go get a glucose challenge test done. that will take ½ day so the husband & i have decided we will check into a hotel after that to make use of our complimentary gift certificate.

other than that, we found that the baby is penyet-ing his face against the womb yet again. this is the 3rd check-up where hes doing this. the doctor says, when hes born, we’ll find that he likes to snuggle. in fact, get this, the doctor said that he was using the placenta as a bolster. can you believe it?? as a bolster?? oh ya… and apparently hes got curly hair. muahahaha… so farnee. “maybe follow the dad” says the doctor. i cannot believe it lah!!! it seems semua pun follow the dad. is nothing of the mom’s worth inheriting? of course we couldn’t see the curls but the doctor could, & she was even using the cursor to point at the curls “see, look at the curls here.”

i am now 59.2kg with the baby at 1.7kg. my back aches are horrendous. i cannot wait for the time when i can go for a full body massage. maybe go to a chiropractor and ask for a back re-alignment. the boobs are a-hurting something fierce. i gots indigestion & heartburn & am so horribly unattractive as i burp myself away in the office. my poor colleagues. the husband offers his support by saying “wow. that was a good one huh?” hehehe… i find myself craving for mcdonald’s oreo mcflurry ice creams every now & again. i cant take the sundaes cos they’re too sweet for my taste. im in my office now & i only just sent a text to my office boy asking him to buy me one. i hope he got my message. if not, i’ll have to drive out & buy one on the way back.

we got a name for blub… however i don’t trust the husband to stick to it. the fickle-minded guy. harummpfff!! anyhoo, i wont be making any announcements till after the little guy comes. just in case i change my mind during the delivery. who knows i might wanna name him after the doctor ke. but then my doctor’s a lady. hmm…

last night i did some more laundry for the baby’s clothes. so cute to see the clothes hanging hehehe. reminds me of the times when i used to live with my sister & do her kids laundry for her. but it can be annoying too. cos small sizes are kinda difficult to hang on adult-sized hangers. sometimes i find myself fighting with the hangers. literally. then the husband has to come in & calm me down hahaha. ada kah… gaduh with hanger?? tsk tsk... blame it on the hormones.

i got a zit on my face. so disappointing. i was hoping for clear skin. instead, i get a zit. ok lah one zit. hehehe… but that’s enough to mar the beauty. hehehe…

ok end of entry cos this momma is feeling tiredness.

baby nursery (or more like "babys corner in parents' room")
i am happy to announce that we have received and assembled the baby cot yippeeyaaiyeiiyahuu. although its a bit chipped but im too lazy to ask for a refund or to make a complaint about it. just a little chip. so i'm gonna do a bit of DIY and use my clear nail polish to varnish it a bit hehe.

7month check-up (29weeks)
we went for a check-up last weekend and i am also happy to announce that Blub is now 1.4kg (the check-up before this he was only 780g). however, i am unhappy to announce that i am now 57.9kg (i gained 4.4kg). gilers ke apa. i feel so fat. although i'm not. my tummy is so out there. my dresses are now hiking up. macam mini skirt plaks. the doctor did warn me that mothers tend to gain the most weight in their 3rd trimester. errkk!! i'm sorry but i'm vain ok. & it appears that i am also fickle. i worry that i'm not gaining enough weight but when the scales actually confirm that i have, i worry too. ok enough about vanity issues.

Blub has eyelashes --muahahahaha... so geli my hati when the doctor said "ahh, & here are his lashes." i so did not expect it. i mean it never crossed my mind lah right to see eyelashes. usually its like "ah ok here are the legs, all 3 of them" or "see heres the beating heart". quite funny also my gynea. with regards to the lashes she also added "ahh, must follow the dad." & i was like "ehhh??? whats wrong with my lashes??" i mean hey, even if Blub inherits mine, he can always get lash extensions just like i did for my wedding. mwhehehehe. then we can bond.

preparing for baby
we're supposed to start attending ante-natal classes now. however the timing clashes with the husband's work-hours. so how ah? hmm...

this weekend we are going shopping for a stroller & rocking chair (& some bedsheets too... maybe some more bottles).

my friend says shes gonna get me one of those baby slings. yippee.

i've been reading some on cloth diapers (as opposed to disposable diapers or the traditional napkins). wonder if they're easier and more worth it to buy. or i could just stick with disposable diapers.

weight gain
i think i'm gonna be big. its cos im constantly hungry now. how dis?? i should stock-up on fruits & vegetables instead of cheezels hor? & i should opt for chicken hor fun soup instead of mee curry. heres a chronology of my weight gain:

prepregnancy - 45 kg
2nd month - 46 kg
3rd month - 48 kg
4th month - 48.5 kg
5th month - 50.4 kg
6th month - 53.5 kg
7th month - 57.9 kg
8th month - est. 62 kg (actual 59.9 kg @ 6weeks to edd)
9th month - est. 66 kg (actual 61.9 kg @ 4weeks to edd)
at delivery - 63.5 kg

ohmygoodnessie... by the end of this pregnancy, i might have gained approximately 20kg from my pre-Blub weight. i cant even take the current weight --my backaches are a real killer. another 2.5months to go. how lah dis? by the way i just ordered a 1kg blueberry cheesecake with oreo base just for me & the husband. methinks me is gonna be beeeeg!! the boobs are.

ok im depressed now.

rain on my parade

don’t you just hate it when you’re celebrating and somehow a wet blanket makes an appearance? i hate wet blankets. i wish a good sun and great gush of wind would come and sort it out.

or else a super-duper big hair-dryer.

begone.

of men & fecal matters

last night as we got in bed, we started talking about blub. contrary to popular belief, we don’t talk about the baby much hehe. in fact, we STILL haven’t decided on a name for blub. I mean, a proper one lah. the baby cant go around introducing himself as BLUB for the rest of his life izenit. its kinda annoying now –the husband’s fickle-mindedness. cos it’s the last trimester and who knows kan, blub might choose to make an early appearance. ok so back to our bedtime conversation. the husband was looking a bit disturbed so here’s an excerpt of our conversation (with a little ad-lib):

me: whats wrong big daddy?
he: im just thinking about the shit. (the husband has a problem with shit, including his own).
me: eh?
he: it took me a while to deal with my own shit.
me: don’t worry. other men have gone through the same thing. they say they got around the disgust when it came to their own kids.
he: i can do EVERYTHING else but can you deal with the shit?
me: but what if i’m sick? you not kesian me kah??
he: i will call my mom.
me: harummphhfff.