etha*n in a hood
he loves the kitchen
running out
running out
running in
come follow me
finally tired
insists on having half his body on the cold tiles
his favorite: asian food channel
my superhero stance
Friday, September 25, 2009
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
etha*n is 14mths old
enough with the sad stuff.
my only son is now already 14mths old. hes an expert at walking now. but hes still got to master steps. the major thing at the moment is talking. hes learning to talk apart from mama, dada and ahhh. he tried saying car (which came out as daa) and duck (which also came out as daa).
hes favorite past-time? the phone. he pretends to be on the phone with whatever he has on hand. it could be his hand, yes, his palm. he places his hand over his ear and pretends to be talking. sometimes when he does have an actual phone in hand, he walks around, pretends to be dialing numbers and then puts it to his ear and walks around talking. macam boss!!
a pacifier is also a phone. a chinese spoon can also be a phone in his world. even his milk bottle. at first, i used to tell him "no baby, thats not a phone. thats a yada yada." but now its come to "ok baby. yes, a pacifier can also be a phone. you've got good imagination." ya lah. tengok james bond movies. the weirdest things can double up as something else right. who knows, etha*n might one day be an inventor/innovator! :D
makan-wise, well, he doesnt seem to like fish. but i'm trying to sneak it into his mouth. not very sabahan, is he? at least not in his porridge. kalau goreng-goreng yang we makan with rice, he'll eat. he doesnt seem to like anything with a hint of sour in it either. so not ME ok. but i'm making the sitter feed him sour stuff like yogurt, apples just so that he'll acquire a tolerance for it. i'm just worried that he wont want to take medication which is usually sour-ish, when necessary. i've also started him on scotts emulsion (the orange one), and he fights me all the time with that. hmm... actually i think i've already mentioned that in an earlier entry right?
christmas is coming. time flies so fast that before we know it, it'll be 2010. ok ya, i know raya pun tak sampai lagi. but this is it for me: every year when raya comes, i start thinking and planning for christmas already. well, usually its the budgeting that i have to do early. and i SHOULD SHOULD start shopping early. ok so, christmas is coming and i'm trying to figure out what to dress him in. takkan beli satu baju kan? i gotta buy SOME new clothes for him. for mass, for visiting, for jalan-jalan.
i got him a new fisherman's hat and boy, does he love it. he'll give you a smile, the kind of smile that says "i know i'm cute". he'll keep still for awhile so that the hat doesnt fall off but then he'll get annoyed & take it off himself.
he can do puzzles to some extent now. well not jigsaw puzzles. i dont know what you call them. those block shapes that you try to insert in the corresponding hole. he can do some. some, he cant do and then gets into a temper due to frustration. its quite funny to see. such a small thing with showing his frustration. when his father is there, you'll hear him say "it's ok son. be patient." me? i just say "dont be angry!"
:D
i'll upload some pictures later.
my only son is now already 14mths old. hes an expert at walking now. but hes still got to master steps. the major thing at the moment is talking. hes learning to talk apart from mama, dada and ahhh. he tried saying car (which came out as daa) and duck (which also came out as daa).
hes favorite past-time? the phone. he pretends to be on the phone with whatever he has on hand. it could be his hand, yes, his palm. he places his hand over his ear and pretends to be talking. sometimes when he does have an actual phone in hand, he walks around, pretends to be dialing numbers and then puts it to his ear and walks around talking. macam boss!!
a pacifier is also a phone. a chinese spoon can also be a phone in his world. even his milk bottle. at first, i used to tell him "no baby, thats not a phone. thats a yada yada." but now its come to "ok baby. yes, a pacifier can also be a phone. you've got good imagination." ya lah. tengok james bond movies. the weirdest things can double up as something else right. who knows, etha*n might one day be an inventor/innovator! :D
makan-wise, well, he doesnt seem to like fish. but i'm trying to sneak it into his mouth. not very sabahan, is he? at least not in his porridge. kalau goreng-goreng yang we makan with rice, he'll eat. he doesnt seem to like anything with a hint of sour in it either. so not ME ok. but i'm making the sitter feed him sour stuff like yogurt, apples just so that he'll acquire a tolerance for it. i'm just worried that he wont want to take medication which is usually sour-ish, when necessary. i've also started him on scotts emulsion (the orange one), and he fights me all the time with that. hmm... actually i think i've already mentioned that in an earlier entry right?
christmas is coming. time flies so fast that before we know it, it'll be 2010. ok ya, i know raya pun tak sampai lagi. but this is it for me: every year when raya comes, i start thinking and planning for christmas already. well, usually its the budgeting that i have to do early. and i SHOULD SHOULD start shopping early. ok so, christmas is coming and i'm trying to figure out what to dress him in. takkan beli satu baju kan? i gotta buy SOME new clothes for him. for mass, for visiting, for jalan-jalan.
i got him a new fisherman's hat and boy, does he love it. he'll give you a smile, the kind of smile that says "i know i'm cute". he'll keep still for awhile so that the hat doesnt fall off but then he'll get annoyed & take it off himself.
he can do puzzles to some extent now. well not jigsaw puzzles. i dont know what you call them. those block shapes that you try to insert in the corresponding hole. he can do some. some, he cant do and then gets into a temper due to frustration. its quite funny to see. such a small thing with showing his frustration. when his father is there, you'll hear him say "it's ok son. be patient." me? i just say "dont be angry!"
:D
i'll upload some pictures later.
Thursday, September 10, 2009
here we go again :-(
So it looks like history has repeated itself. At 2 months pregnant, I was informed that the foetus has not developed and in fact, that I was having (yes having at that present moment) a missed miscarriage.
Sigh.
This means that I “missed” the miscarriage i.e. that I didn’t know that I had had one. This is because there was no bleeding experienced. Basically, the pregnancy was still there but the foetus was not alive. So I was given some pills to help begin the bleeding and get the expulsion of the pregnancy on its way.
Sigh.
I’m not as sad as with the first miscarriage but I’m still sad. And worried. How could this happen to me twice? How could it happen to me at all? Did I do something wrong, eat something wrong, drink something wrong? Will it happen again... & again? Is it punishment for my sins? Probably. The gynea says it’s nothing to do with what I did. That it’s usually something wrong with the foetus itself & the body is just ridding itself of something that’s not right. Like quality control. Ok. That comforts me on an intellectual level. But in my heart, I still ask the questions.
Sigh.
So we shall try again next year. I’m sad for the foetus. For both the “lives” that I’ve lost this year. For Catholics abortion is wrong because we believe life begins at the point of conception, not at birth. So I feel sad that these lives ended in me. I’m also sad for Etha*n. I so wanted siblings for him. For him not to feel alone. See I grew up in a family of 6 kids & lots of cousins. I wanted that for him. I wanted him to share baby talk with a brother / sister. To fight. To love. To play.
Sigh.
God forgive me for all my sins. I endeavour to be a good person, a healthy person in body, mind & spirit so that I will be a good root for the life that will come from me, a good home for the life who will live in me for 9 months & later, with me, for at least 30 years (hehehe).
Bless me. Bless me. Bless me.
Sigh.
This means that I “missed” the miscarriage i.e. that I didn’t know that I had had one. This is because there was no bleeding experienced. Basically, the pregnancy was still there but the foetus was not alive. So I was given some pills to help begin the bleeding and get the expulsion of the pregnancy on its way.
Sigh.
I’m not as sad as with the first miscarriage but I’m still sad. And worried. How could this happen to me twice? How could it happen to me at all? Did I do something wrong, eat something wrong, drink something wrong? Will it happen again... & again? Is it punishment for my sins? Probably. The gynea says it’s nothing to do with what I did. That it’s usually something wrong with the foetus itself & the body is just ridding itself of something that’s not right. Like quality control. Ok. That comforts me on an intellectual level. But in my heart, I still ask the questions.
Sigh.
So we shall try again next year. I’m sad for the foetus. For both the “lives” that I’ve lost this year. For Catholics abortion is wrong because we believe life begins at the point of conception, not at birth. So I feel sad that these lives ended in me. I’m also sad for Etha*n. I so wanted siblings for him. For him not to feel alone. See I grew up in a family of 6 kids & lots of cousins. I wanted that for him. I wanted him to share baby talk with a brother / sister. To fight. To love. To play.
Sigh.
God forgive me for all my sins. I endeavour to be a good person, a healthy person in body, mind & spirit so that I will be a good root for the life that will come from me, a good home for the life who will live in me for 9 months & later, with me, for at least 30 years (hehehe).
Bless me. Bless me. Bless me.
belated announcement again
this entry was drafted earlier @ 7 weeks pregnant.
hello world,
i wish to make an announcement. we’re pregnant again :d. we’re ecstatic but a bit more cautious about announcing it. we’ve told my family (& my mom has announced it to her world). my mil knows but hasn’t disclosed it to anyone (i think). i think she knows we’re being cautious this time around.
i was a day late and knew that i was probably pregnant since i have an on-the-dot kind of menstrual cycle. so, i got myself a home test kit & tested myself at 4am. positive. even etha*n got up to celebrate :d. true to my anal self, i tested myself when i was 2 days late, 3 days late and 1 week late. all positive.
i called my gynea @ 4 weeks and saw her @ 6 weeks+.
she confirmed the pregnancy. i wish i could say “everything is well!” but at the check-up we didn’t see a heartbeat. i’m not sure if it is something to worry about or not. we’re also a bit worried because of my previous miscarriage cos we also didn’t see a heartbeat then. but let’s be positive. i’m not bleeding. & i’ve read that some people don’t see a heartbeat till much later due to whatever lah. the gynea gave me some meds to stabilize the womb. let’s hope for the best.
my symptoms with this pregnancy:
- lots of zits (yuck)
- constant hunger (i’ve even gotten up at 3am hungry)
- fatigue
- emo (tears & short-temperedness)
just as a record, at 6 weeks pregnant:
age: 32yo
weight: 48kg
hair: short, colored, white hair making an appearance
general: no morning sickness (yet).
i used a pregnancy weight gain calculator & which said that i would gain a total of 33.97 lbs. thats approximately 15kg. sobs… i’ll be 63kg. but never mind. i gained abt the same weight with etha*n so lets hope i can lose it all again.
keeping the faith!
hello world,
i wish to make an announcement. we’re pregnant again :d. we’re ecstatic but a bit more cautious about announcing it. we’ve told my family (& my mom has announced it to her world). my mil knows but hasn’t disclosed it to anyone (i think). i think she knows we’re being cautious this time around.
i was a day late and knew that i was probably pregnant since i have an on-the-dot kind of menstrual cycle. so, i got myself a home test kit & tested myself at 4am. positive. even etha*n got up to celebrate :d. true to my anal self, i tested myself when i was 2 days late, 3 days late and 1 week late. all positive.
i called my gynea @ 4 weeks and saw her @ 6 weeks+.
she confirmed the pregnancy. i wish i could say “everything is well!” but at the check-up we didn’t see a heartbeat. i’m not sure if it is something to worry about or not. we’re also a bit worried because of my previous miscarriage cos we also didn’t see a heartbeat then. but let’s be positive. i’m not bleeding. & i’ve read that some people don’t see a heartbeat till much later due to whatever lah. the gynea gave me some meds to stabilize the womb. let’s hope for the best.
my symptoms with this pregnancy:
- lots of zits (yuck)
- constant hunger (i’ve even gotten up at 3am hungry)
- fatigue
- emo (tears & short-temperedness)
just as a record, at 6 weeks pregnant:
age: 32yo
weight: 48kg
hair: short, colored, white hair making an appearance
general: no morning sickness (yet).
i used a pregnancy weight gain calculator & which said that i would gain a total of 33.97 lbs. thats approximately 15kg. sobs… i’ll be 63kg. but never mind. i gained abt the same weight with etha*n so lets hope i can lose it all again.
keeping the faith!
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