etha*n is a changeling

- he clasps his hands in front of him & starts staring at his mittens with such concentration that i myself start looking at them.

-he sucks on his fore arm instead of his mittens. maybe because i keep telling him he cant suck on his mittens.

- he sleeps by hiding his face on my chest or shoulder –yes hiding. with the nose penyet-ed on me. which is cute but also worrying. i worry that he cant breathe and i worry that his nose will be permanently flattened. haha.

- i think hes teething cos he seems to want to bite us. & he drools all the time.

- he has a temper –omg does he have a temper. he must get this from me lah ni.

- hes trying to sit up on his own which is also worrying cos he is forever curled into a sitting position now. takuts nanti hunched?

- he knows us. i notice that he will calm down when i take him. & he looks at me instead of anyone else. & when his dad comes, he will give a toothless smile. but then again, he smiles all the time. hmm..

last weekend we had a bit of a scare with him. he was throwing up his milk at each and every feed. and his stool was dark green to the point of being black (I would post a picture of it here but it might disgust you hehe). we wanted to take him to the clinic but the few we went to was closed for the long weekend. however upon consultation with those in-the-know (i.e. medical school dropouts), ethan could’ve been shocked (terkejut) or masuk angin. apparently when babies are shocked they are unsettled & the blackish stool is actually bile. and the puke is also yellow. not milky white but bile yellow. so sad ok. towards the end tu, when he was puking bile instead of milk, i was crying while he was puking. susah my hati.

this all started on saturday night cos we took him to his uncle’s house at about 730pm. he started puking at 930pm and only stopped puking the next morning. not lah puke continuously but right after his feeds. and he pukes out of the nose as well. then he’ll cry so pitifully –so heart wrenching ok. & I’ll be holding him to my chest with the puke drenching both of us. I can’t even put him down or pass him to the husband as he doesn’t want me to let go. so sweet hor but so very very kasian like that.

the kadazans/chinese/malays/indians all believe almost the same thing:

i) kadazans – masuk angin or something shocked him

ii) chinese – terkejut cos something shocked him

iii) indians – don’t take him out at night because there are “things” roaming about & children are more sensitive to this than adults

iv) malays – taking him out at about 7-730pm is not a good time because there are “things” roaming about

v) indonesian – masuk angin or something shocked him

im not gonna argue with anything. so i'll just play it safe for now. i mean maybe this is all superstition but surely theres some scientific logic behind it right, as with most superstition.

its amazing how fast time has flown & how big he is now. he'll turn 4months next week. i wonder what new things are gonna happen. but in my readings, the turning 4months apparently brings with it many challenges. crankiness, changing sleep & feed habits etc. sebab tunggu gigi keluar i suppose & theres a growth spurt in the 4th month.

so, heres to more change. i hope we'll survive it!

(other people's explanation for) what motherhood does to me

No matter how much you prepare for it, parenting will blow your mind.

Kids will challenge you, bring you to tears, crack you up,
and make you forget what you urgently had to do.

They'll shatter the life you knew into a million pieces.

Then they'll put it back together, like a stained-glass window,
into something infinitely more complicated and beautiful.

awww...

yet another milestone

today i join the throngs of people who send their kids to someone else to care for.

my parents abandoned us on saturday. & for most of the weekend, it was just us 3 as a family.

i'm proud to announce that i even managed to sweep, mop & do the laundry. clap clap clap for me. the husband has also attempted to feed etha*n. unfortunately for him, the baby's started becoming a bit unpredictable with his feed times. unfortunately for me, the husband fell sick yesterday so he hasnt been able to help me with the baby. never mind. hes made up for it by doing the housework.

today is etha*n's first day with my MIL's maid. yes, despite all my complaints, we have decided to send him to her after all. better a known devil than an unknown one (ok i gotta stop being bitchy). also, we found out that the babysitters in kepong run up to rm650 - rm750. madness hor? ALSO, because the MIL's maid is a bit sot-sot, we've decided to apply for the new maid at the end of the month. if the new maid comes early, then she will stay with us & in the mornings i'll send her & the baby to my SIL's. & later when the MIL's maid goes bye-bye in june 2009, the new maid will move in with the MIL. the financial arrangements are that we split the cost of getting the new maid as well as her monthly pay 50-50. my dad asked me why dont i just get my own maid. well, one i live in an apartment & i've got no place for the maid to "live" in (not just sleep in). second, i live in an apartment & i need some privacy.

ok so back to my son's childcare arrangements: hes with the maid now. i told him to make sure he smiles at her a lot so that her hati pun sejuk towards him. & boy has he taken my instructions to heart. he has smiled & chuckled non-stop since saturday night when we went there to visit & get him used to the maid. so much so that one of the uncles told him to "save it for tomorrow". hehehe. in the mornings i drive him to my MIL's with him sitting in the car seat next to me. which apparently is not the right place for him but at the moment i need him to be able to see me or else he'll be cranky. so, i'll be driving & he'll be smiling at me. so farnee.

i'm heading home now to get my son. i cant wait to see him.

3mths old today

etha*n is 3 months old today :-). happy birthday my ball of a baby boy. i love love love you.

hes going for a jab today. so i hope he'll take it well like he did the last one. but i know he might get a fever in the early hours of the morning. poor baby.

he can laugh & chitchat & turn over onto his tummy & scream & tsktsk & pull himself up to a sitting position.

his grandpa says that he is demanding & determined & has a temper. i hope he wont be like me.

my mom says that he is physically present but mentally absent because sometimes hes staring straight at you but when you say something hes jolted out of his reverie.

he smiles a lot & chortles & plays along when he is tickled.

at 2 months & 3 weeks old, he weighed in at 6.71kg. so maybe hes 7kgs today?

he recognizes his daddy & i love seeing them together. he loves his music & sings along all the time. but mostly when hes sleepy & being rocked to sleep.

when he wants attention, he gives a little cough here & there. till you pay attention. so cute lah.

the best is waking up & seeing him sleeping contentedly next to me. & i love saying "dont cry, mummy's right here."

i took him to church yesterday & he was such a good boy. i guess the airconditioning helped some. lucky me.

i cant wait till its december & he goes off on his first plane ride. & celebrates his first christmas. & meets his sabahan side. i want them to say: hello baby etha*n, you're half sabahan too.

for my friend

although you don't want it,

i'll give it to you anyways.

so here's my heartfelt wishes to you.

~pat pat~

~hug hug~

and hold on to this:

you're not alone.

come talk to me if you want.

my son's milestones

i cant believe how time has flown.

• started drooling
• starts wearing bibs for drool-control
• stopped using mittens because he sucks on them so much then smears drool all over his face giving him a pimply look :-p
• sick for the first time; he has the flu & is coughing. altho its quite sad to see him like this, his coughs are really cute.

who knew i could love someone this much? even his awful-est, nastiest smells are addictive to me. really.

the best is the sour-y smell of his teeny tiny fingers, enclosed in drool-soaked mittens & fermented day & night. masam... but hes my son & i love everything about him.

ok maybe his poop smell is an acquired thing. but i'm getting there. :-D

i am so anal

some day when my son is older, he will read this & think my madre said "anal".

he is nearly 10weeks old & i am already planning his first birthday. oh well, better to be prepared right? right.

we've decided on the theme & even his attire for the day. we already have an idea of what kind of entertainment he'll have. in fact, i've already started on the guest list (?!!??) & we're about to buy the party supplies.

lucky kid.

saiko mom.

anyways, ive also made a list of things to pack for our trip back to sabah. if i was totally without control, i would've already started packing now. hihihi... actualllllyyyy... i already put his clothes aside. in fact, we've already bought his christmas baju. timberland summore. omg im gonna spoil him silly. how lah this? but but but... theres hope for me still cos i havent bought his attire for my brother's wedding. but hmm... when shall i do that? i was also thinking of getting another diaper bag but the backpack type so i can stuff all his things in & still have my hands free to deal with him while we're at the airport. but it is too pricey lah... about rm300 to rm500. madness or what. i read in this forum that one lady paid rm1700 for hers. gilos.

what present can i give him for christmas ah?

i recently ordered something for him & it will be delivered by october. not for christmas but i feel bad that we actually havent bought him many things. most of his clothes are either hand-me-downs or gifts from other people. but we, his parents, havent really gotten him anything. other than the cot & the car seat.

i want to get him some developmental toys. or some kiddy music cds or books. but then i'll need a small player to put in my room.

at the moment he has this to play with:

i so geram with him lah.