Hello.

It’s been some time. Quite a long some time since I’ve posted anything here.

I have 2 blogs, and the initial intention was to keep family-type entries separate from other-type entries. In hindsight (and with much confusion as to which blog should be updated, when), there’s really no point in having 2 blogs since life, is life, and everything is intermeshed into one anyhow. So, I’m probably just updating one blog from hereon (and will try to maintain the other, just so past entries are not lost).

So. Some updates since my last entry.

Ethan is now 5yo and attending year 1 of kindergarten in a nearby, rather well-known pre-school franchise, which has good school amenities (as opposed to other pre-schools in the same fee range). Lots of Chinese classmates, with a smattering of Indians and Malays. So he sounds a lot Chinese. I think it’s an alright mix. He started play school when he was 4yo (in 2012) and had an Indian teacher who was lovely. This year, we chose a Chinese teacher for him just to give him a “rounded education”. Perhaps next year, when he’s 6yo, we’ll choose a Malay teacher to prepare him for primary school. He’s doing well and it quite a talkative little boy. Loves everything American Idol (especially Ryan Seacrest, microphones, speakers & stages). At some point, he was a big Tom Jones fan and was able to perform a couple songs (with much panache!) Ethan is still not much of an eater. He doesn’t take anything sweet (other than classic donuts which he calls snow donuts or our make-do, snow toast which he has at home). He is a big fan of spaghetti & pepperoni pizza. Quite the daredevil when it comes to water parks. Hates alligators. He can recite the Our Father, Hail Mary & Glory Be with minimal mistakes – and says his nightly prayers to ward away “bad dreams”. Pretty protective over his little sister but lately has started defending himself as she’s always trying to irritate him.

Ava is now 2yo and is a real mummy’s girl. She’s super touchy-feely and loves to touch my arms while sucking her 2 fingers –her comfort when she’s feeling sleepy. She’s doing great development-wise, excellent motor skills, loves to climb, run, balance, do the downward-facing dog pose, is able to speak & converse pretty well. Oh yes, she can tell jokes. She loves chocolates & sweet drinks, cakes, sweets and is basically like any typical kid who stuff their faces with junk until stopped. Generally, shes got no problems with eating but do have a preference for the junk over the nutritious. Still, shes game for trying out new things (plain yoghurt with honey, all sorts of fruits & juices). She’s quite possessive over me, and cannot see me sitting with daddy or big brother Ethan. She swings between being a princess (loves purple & pink, glitter etc) and being a tomboy (loves jeans, shorts). Ava’s relationship with her father is somewhat funny with her always insisting “I love mummy”, even if the father says “But I love you Ava!”. Like Ethan, Ava too sleeps through the night. Unlike her brother, she never took to the pacifier much, preferring instead her own fingers. Often times, her hands smell icky due to her sucking but I love it. It’s amazing how the horrid smells your own child emits/creates is something that you revel in (yes including their morning breath).

Both the kids get along pretty well with each other. Thanks to Ethan who just loves his sister and wouldn’t allow us to be too hard on her, even if shes naughty and hes getting bullied.

So now we get to the latest news.

We’re expecting Baby No. 3. I am about 14 weeks and am due on 6 Apr 2014 (based on LMP) OR 16 weeks and due on 29 Mar 2014 (based on baby’s development). In short, I’m past my 1st trimester and all the inherent challenges therein. We were definitely trying for a 3rd child, my being 36 this year and wanting to add on to the brood. So we weren’t surprised when the home kit tested positive (well I wasn’t; the husband, on the other hand, fell back on his default reaction: skepticism. tsk tsk). Given my history with early miscarriages, we went full out on the pregnancy support (as prescribed by the gynea) to ensure that the pregnancy is, well, supported. So far so good. 1^st trimester has come and gone and I’m off the support. Baby is doing good and hopefully will continue to be blessed and do well till delivery. We’ll be able to tell the gender at the next check-up (which is about 2 weeks away). ~Let baby be healthy and strong~

Ethan seems to be doing ok with the news and often kisses my tummy saying “Hello Baby!”. However, apparently, he did mention to his cousin “My mummy is having another baby. She doesn’t love me anymore.”

Ava, hmm, I’m not too sure. I don’t think she understand what this means. But when you lay it out clearly, she seems to know how it will affect her. Example:

Me: Ava, you’re gonna have a baby soon! You’re gonna be a “Kakak”.

Ava: Noooo… I not big! I baby!

Plus, everyone keeps talking to me about the middle child syndrome. Sigh. I hope she doesn’t have too hard a time. Ethan had it a bit tough when Ava was born, and he wasn’t even the clingy type. Ava on the other hand, is very attached to me and that seems to have escalated lately (perhaps due to Baby No. 3 coming).

Oh well. Let’s just hope everything and everyone will be ok.

So, there’s my news. Will hopefully be able to post new entries every now and again. Perhaps not as often as before, when I used to have more downtime than my present company. Till then.  

ava elizabeth

hello world.

my name is ava.

i was born on monday, 2 may 2011

weight: 2.84kg

height: 46.0cm

pantai medical centre

ava came into our world 10days ahead of her edd. this we expected. i was feeling all the aches & pains & had taken a week off from work even before i delivered her.

she came on a public holiday. phew. at least we didnt have to worry about traffic. i feel so lucky that for both kids, labor signs came while i was at home.

the night before she came, i had some brown-tinged discharge but i wasnt really sure if it was my deteriorating eye sight or the real deal. the husband had gone out with friends & i didnt want to seem like a wet blanket so i didnt call him back.

however, he was already home when i got up to use the bathroom, felt what i thought was my water bag leaking & saw the blood-tinged discharge at 4am. so i warned him to get some rest cos baby was coming.

while he slept, i quickly got on the computer & sent out my handover notes to my colleagues. i'm not as efficient this time around haha. with that out of the way, i was more mentally prepared to have ava :)

so, morning came & the doctor told me to make my way to the hospital. we left about 1030am & got to the hospital shortly after (since it was a public holiday & there was minimal traffic).

at the hospital, they confirmed that my water bag broke. the contractions were so mild that i wasnt in much pain (at first). at 2pm, they decided to induce me. still the pain didnt come as quickly as when they induced me with ethan. but when it came at about 4-ish pm, BOY, did it come! damn painful. again i took the pethidine jab & later the gas. but labor was so short that the gas didnt get to work its magic on me. i was screaming in pain. next thing i knew, they were prepping me to push. i had enough conscious thought to turn around & look at the clock which read 5.45pm. then the pushing started. again i got irritated with everyone for telling me not to scream but just to push. crazy or what. i was in pain. i had to scream. haha... but of course, i listened & pushed as well. i remember almost telling them "stop asking me to push. why dont you just PULL her outtttttt!!" i was also thinking to myself "omg, when isit gonna endddd??"

finally.

ava came 5 minutes later i.e. at 5.50pm.

she looked blue to me but doctor said that she was fine. well, she was crying so i guess doctor was telling me the truth.

she had a head full of hair. she didnt scream too loudly. the husband got to cut the cord this time around. then they whipped baby off to the nursery for a quick check. she came back to us moments later.

i delivered her at 5.50pm & didnt sleep till probably 2am. the husband went home to keep ethan company so i was by myself with ava in the hospital.

everything went ok. i was able to get up & use the bathroom a couple of times. i remember being so afraid to move after i had ethan. now pro already lah :)

so there you go. the arrival of my long awaited 2nd born.

shes a real cutie pie. ethan didnt take to her well when we got home. in fact he became quite possessive of me. which is something new since he has never been one to cling on to me. but its nice to know he loves me hehe. the poor husband got kicked, slapped & scratched though. for trying to keep ethan away from me & the baby. poor guy. but a week has passed & as i predicted, ethan is doing much better now as a big brother.

breastfeeding is easier this time around & i'm looking forward to fully doing so during my 2 months maternity leave. so wish me luck!

will hopefully be more rajin in updating ava's progress now that shes here.

oh ya. we had a bit of a drama while choosing the name for her.

actually, ava has always been my choice but funnily, i was being very fickle minded during my pregnancy. so, while we were in the hospital, we decided on another name for her. & after i delivered her, the husband even told our families of the chosen name. BUT THENNNN, i changed my mind again & decided to stick to ava. so the husband had to make some calls to retract his announcement hahaha...

but it's ava now. i dont know why i was being fickle when in fact, i was already calling her that while she was in my tummy.

:)

news

this post was drafted earlier on 2 September 2010

Great news!

We’re expecting again! The irony is that I had a miscarriage on Merdeka Day last year & this year on Merdeka Day, I find out that I’m pregnant. Wonderful news!

So, next step is to pray & pray real hard that this little one won’t leave me like the other 2 little ones before him (or her).

I know I’ve asked some of my friends to pray for me to conceive but I hope you’ll continue to pray for me to have a strong baby who will make it through the first trimester. Bless me. Bless me. Bless me. Doesn’t matter if you’re not a Catholic. I’m not fussy about prayers just as long as you bless me.

O’ little baby, please don’t go away. Be strong & healthy & resilient & survive. Please survive.

Tradition calls for me to note some observations at the beginning of all my pregnancies. So here goes!

Early symptoms
- facial blemishes
- bloating
- early morning hunger –ravenous like that.
- emotional (tears & temper)
- cravings for lala
- no nausea yet
- some fatigue


As a reminder to my future (fat) self:

Age: 33yoWeight: 48kg
Hair: Bob cut, colored due to grey hair making a vigorous appearance
Weight: 48kg
Mood: Emotional –can you believe I cried when we sang Negaraku in church?
Cravings: lala, beef ball noodles
Nausea: not yet

Who am I kidding? I write in nonchalance, as if I have not a care in the world. But I do. I have ONE care right now. And it’s one BIG care. I’ve gone through 2 miscarriages. & I am worried sick about this pregnancy. The minute I peed on that stick, the 2 lines formed immediately. Positive?? Tilt head… POSITIVE!! I was so happy… I’ve been praying for this. In fact, I’ve been praying for just this, THIS MONTH, THIS CYCLE. & yes, shamelessy, I’ve asked friends to pray for me too. I know you may have thought that I was jesting, but I wasn’t. I don’t have to delve into the deepest reaches of my heart to find the seriousness that came with that request. It’s all over my heart. I SO WANTED TO BE PREGNANT. & there I was with a stick & 2 lines. I was pregnant!

Then I started crying because it hit me: it could happen again. I don’t want to lose another one. I don’t. Please don’t let me lose another. I see all these pregnant moms around me & I start wishing that I was one of them. They must be ever so happy & delirious in their anticipation. If I have to go through another loss, I’ll be a statistic, which I already am. But if I have 3 consecutive miscarriages then I’ll be in a different statistic pool.The husband told me to stop crying & to suck it up (that’s my line by the way, which he stole). That the baby “cant tell the difference between tears of happiness & tears of joy” (ok that made me laugh). He meant happiness vs sadness I guess. But I couldn’t stop crying. That was 3 days ago.

We’ve decided to keep it under wraps for the 1st trimester. Yes, we’re trying not to tell anyone… that’s a big thing for the husband ok. He cant keep secrets from his mom. I dont know how to keep this a secret unless I was locked up in the house for 3 months. The day after I found out about my pregnancy, a colleague sauntered up to me & asked if I was pregnant. Shocking huh? Apparently she had a dream about me being pregnant :). Maybe she’s psychic. Maybe I should ask her to dream about my having delivered a healthy baby. Sigh.


Thank you Lord for blessing me again.

I hope this time, You’ll allow me to keep this one.

I pray that this new life I’m carrying will be a strong one & that it will not leave me too prematurely.

Guide me to make the best choices for my body and my baby.

Pray give me good thoughts so that this will be a good & conducive home for my littlest one.

etha*ns turning 1

etha*ns turning 1 in july. the birthday theme is liverpool fc / football.

its not really a big do but the husband's relatives are so many that it seems like a big do.

we're having it at my mil's house (cos we live in an apartment). the kids will be going to a small playground for their games. i've outsourced this to my sil & cil to plan & administer. i'm hopeless at games. i hope parents arent expecting a carnival-like atmosphere with ferris wheels and clowns on stilts. its just a simple afternoon in the playground with some drinks and sandwiches for the kids.

for the kids menu, we'll be featuring lots of fried finger food, cupcakes, candy, potato chips etc (so please be forewarned that the menu will sport some mighty unhealthy food choices ya!). my motto for the day is: let the children live life to the fullest! but we will be making one dish thats healthy (either rice, noodles or pasta) so the kids will have something thats filling and nutritious. oh ya and there'll be fruits too... i think.

we'll also have a movie screening once everyone's had their dinner & are settled in. thinking of featuring one of the newer cartoons. i wonder if ice age 3 will be out by then?? even came up with posters for the movies but it depends on whats available. i'll paste it in front of the tv room. maybe i'll come up with a movie stub for the kids too. i found microwaveable sweet popcorn at cold storage. yippee! personally i like them salty but hey, these are little kiddies.

we're not having any clowns or magicians or ponies cos we dont have the money for it. & i'm still thinking of what else i can do thats cheap but fun. we MIGHT have a photo booth if i can find a polaroid camera to pinjam. but i heard that the camera cartridge is pricey. i have an inflatable gym which we'll blow up for the kids to play in but my mil's house is a bit cramped so not sure where to put it. i was thinking of the playground where the kids will be having their games but the husband doesnt think its a good idea.

i have half of the party packs ready but need to get the other half from a party supplies shop. i ordered the cake & cupcakes from www.specialcakes.net based on recommendations so i'm praying they'll taste as good as they look. we've hired the caterer (phew). we've bought the alcohol (for the adults, not for the kids). i've got the husband and etha*n's jerseys. original ones ok. tsk tsk men. i'll go get my ciplak one some day soon. nak kena cari mana pun i dunno. i just hope they'll be cheapo-cheapo. i've created the decorations (ok ya im anal lah ok... i started planning from like january haha) so i dont need to buy any. hopefully they'll turn out ok when i print them out.

ok then wish me luck. will post the pictures after the event. my boy is turning one! so fast.

dangly bits

so, the baby has dangly bits. hihihi... the husband says now hes got an "heir to the throne". the throne being the tandas. hahaha...

baby's a-ok. its funny how the in-laws were very sure that it would be a girl. but my family got it right. im still not so sure how people can tell by the shape of my tummy. "very round" they said. "must be a girl". yet others will say "you dont look preggers from the back. must be a boy."

whatever lah. whats important is that the dr told us shes very happy with the babys developments. we're at 17weeks+1day today & the baby is the right size & is growing as per that age. we saw the dangly bits & heard the heartbeat. sounded muffled due to the amniotic fluid.

the bill this time around was more reasonable at rm240. thank goodness!

consultation & scanning RM80 (& we got 3 print-outs too!!)
blood test RM80
medication RM80

i forgot to bring some mandarins for dr yap. who knows she might give us a discount izenit hehehe. anyways i checked with her on how much for the delivery (normal vs c-sect) in pantai. rm5k for normal (with epidural) and rm8k for c-sect. depending on whether i deliver on a weekday, weekend or public holiday, it might go up to rm10k. having babies are expensive.