we are 5 weeks away from the EDD.
but you know what they say –it can be plus/minus 2 weeks. so im more than a little nervous right now. seeing as its my first time, i don’t even know what to expect. even with the baby movements, i don’t know whats a kick or a twitch or a punch or whatever. people ask me “oh wheres the head & wheres the feet?” & im like “errr… i dunnnnoooo!!” apparently, pregnant women will get braxton hicks contractions –this is the body’s way of practicing for real labor contractions. but, yeah, you guessed it… i don’t know whether i’m having these practice contractions or if its really the baby moving. so i worry that i wont know when the time comes. of course, every piece of literature i’ve come across says that “you’ll know” when it’s the real thing. i’m afraid that i wont get to the hospital in time & blub will be delivered in the car. i’m afraid that the husband wont be around when the water bag breaks, seeing as his working hours are different than mine. he says he will arrange for a back-up but i really really want him to be there from the first pain, the first realization, the first anything. cos i’ll be so afraid.
i’m afraid of going through the labor pains. of having an episiotomy. of tearing naturally. of not being able to have a doodie dot com session after the delivery for fear of tearing the stitches. of going through hours & hours of labor. i’m afraid that i cant deliver vaginally & have to have a c-section. now i’m thinking why don’t i just opt for a c-section in advance? but you see, my mom had 6 of us normally. my sisters had their kids normally. other women who are smaller than i am had their kids normally. so i should be able to do it too right? but my doctor says it really depends on how big the baby is compared to me.
i hope the husband cries when i cry. that’ll be justice enough. in the husband’s family, shouting in pain during labor is considered embarrassing. me being me, i joked that i’ll shout & scream my head off even if i wasn’t in pain just to make the husband feel guilty. but now, now, i’m genuinely scared.
the husband’s aunt who’s married to an italian says that it is the italian custom for the husband to give the wife diamonds for giving him a son. & seeing as the husband is so perasan that he is an italian (not) muahahaha… so i wonder, wonder, wonder… would i be getting any rocks? tengok-tengok dapat batu sungai hihihihi… which of course i will throw at him… no lah, i’ll treasure it forever. maybe i’ll timbun it with layers and layers of soil, rock, sand etc… & billions of years from now it will turn into petroleum & will make my descendents rich oil tycoons.
see, always find the positive in things. hihihi… yes, even if you get accused of day dreaming too much…
but you know what they say –it can be plus/minus 2 weeks. so im more than a little nervous right now. seeing as its my first time, i don’t even know what to expect. even with the baby movements, i don’t know whats a kick or a twitch or a punch or whatever. people ask me “oh wheres the head & wheres the feet?” & im like “errr… i dunnnnoooo!!” apparently, pregnant women will get braxton hicks contractions –this is the body’s way of practicing for real labor contractions. but, yeah, you guessed it… i don’t know whether i’m having these practice contractions or if its really the baby moving. so i worry that i wont know when the time comes. of course, every piece of literature i’ve come across says that “you’ll know” when it’s the real thing. i’m afraid that i wont get to the hospital in time & blub will be delivered in the car. i’m afraid that the husband wont be around when the water bag breaks, seeing as his working hours are different than mine. he says he will arrange for a back-up but i really really want him to be there from the first pain, the first realization, the first anything. cos i’ll be so afraid.
i’m afraid of going through the labor pains. of having an episiotomy. of tearing naturally. of not being able to have a doodie dot com session after the delivery for fear of tearing the stitches. of going through hours & hours of labor. i’m afraid that i cant deliver vaginally & have to have a c-section. now i’m thinking why don’t i just opt for a c-section in advance? but you see, my mom had 6 of us normally. my sisters had their kids normally. other women who are smaller than i am had their kids normally. so i should be able to do it too right? but my doctor says it really depends on how big the baby is compared to me.
i hope the husband cries when i cry. that’ll be justice enough. in the husband’s family, shouting in pain during labor is considered embarrassing. me being me, i joked that i’ll shout & scream my head off even if i wasn’t in pain just to make the husband feel guilty. but now, now, i’m genuinely scared.
the husband’s aunt who’s married to an italian says that it is the italian custom for the husband to give the wife diamonds for giving him a son. & seeing as the husband is so perasan that he is an italian (not) muahahaha… so i wonder, wonder, wonder… would i be getting any rocks? tengok-tengok dapat batu sungai hihihihi… which of course i will throw at him… no lah, i’ll treasure it forever. maybe i’ll timbun it with layers and layers of soil, rock, sand etc… & billions of years from now it will turn into petroleum & will make my descendents rich oil tycoons.
see, always find the positive in things. hihihi… yes, even if you get accused of day dreaming too much…
No comments:
Post a Comment